before (2) Betrayal (2) Day 30 LoA Challenge (1) divorce (13) Eckart Tolle (6) EFT (1) Ester Hicks (4) home made with love (8) law of attraction 30 day challenge (33) Letting go (4) LoA Mistakes (1) Luck (2) my metamorphosis (24) Oprah (1) Pay it forward (2) PMS (1) safety girl (1) the law of attraction (2) The Observer (2) weightloss (13) Why I started the LoA 30 Day Challenge (5)
- ▼ July (4)
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
What is this Law of Attraction 30 day challenge?
For me, it is a personal journey into spiritual growth and enlightenment. I fiercely wanted to change my attitude about my life situation. I have been a spiritual self help junky for over 20 years… through out the years I fell off the wagon and got caught up in DRAMA, pain, misery…and so forth.
But, I would always pick myself up, dust off, pull up my bootstraps and jump back on. After going through a heart breaking divorce, losing my home, family, friends and the man I cherished, I was emotionally and spiritually LOST!
I left an abusive marriage penny less, lived in a domestic violence shelter with my baby girl, and for several months I stayed at various peoples homes and lived out of the car.
I experienced so much betrayal during this time that I often questioned if I should have just sucked it up, kept my mouth shut, and continue to live in an extremely dysfunctional marriage.
I experienced severe depression, sought professional help, and was honest about it in court. I was actually disciplined for my honesty, and even though I chose to live at my mom's home three months prior, I was ordered to live there under a six month supervised house arrest. Boy, did my ex ever take advantage of that. He treated me like a second class prisoner with no rights. He even (policed) me, barging into my "bedroom" when I was not there.
My attitude for several years during and after the marriage was to expect the worst. That way I would never be disappointed. What happened was that I was attracting exactly that. The Worst! It came in a storm of negative energy and swallowed me up whole. From every corner I faced, fresh hell would appear. I attracted more betrayal, more abuse, and more misery. It got to the point where I could not even speak clearly anymore. For the first six months of my year in a half divorce battle I developed a serious stutter. It got to the point where I didn’t even want to attempt to speak; it was that physically painful. I cried on a daily basis, and grieved most horribly over the death of our marriage.
I absolutely hated MEN and kept clear of any potential romance. I sunk so far that I did not have the strength to care for myself and I thought seriously about ending my life. It truly is a miracle how far I have come and that I am alive to tell about it.
After getting settled into a new life of sorts. I gradually started to tap back in to the life I once knew. A beautiful, magical and empowering spiritual life of living in the present. Of being excited about my present moment because when there- anything is possible.
But the storm was not done with me yet, I had another huge hurdle to leap. How can I possibly live in the present when my present moment slaps me in the face with such negative force each and every time I walk in the door? That is when I decided a major spiritual intervention was needed. This 30 day Law of Attraction Challenge is my personal journey of finding peace, beauty, and magic in the midst of pain, suffering, betrayal, death and dying.
It took three months to get to day 30 of the challenge. I had some setbacks during the course of this, but I never gave up! Instead I allowed the challenge to take as long as it needed and I applied the setbacks to the challenge. Each day documented is a personal, empowering, and spiritual awakening for me, and as it happens for a few others as well.
I will continue on this journey and blog about it when the Universe urges me to.
Live your bliss.