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Thursday, March 26, 2009

The Inner Critic in all of us.



This morning as I was drinking coffee and reading random blogs, I stumbled on SunEGrl's blog post about.... Mind-Body and Image...http://sunegrl72.blogspot.com/2009/01/mind-body-image.html
In her post, she really touched a chord with me, she wrote:  
"I think a big part of losing weight is a mental challenge and learning to love yourself no matter what your size."  
She got me thinking about what I am telling myself about my body image. I have been working diligently at trying to lose my divorce weight for almost two months now. My weight has been a roller coaster of ups and downs during these months.  I have noticed that I am being my own worst enemy- not my ex, as I have stated publicly and steadily! What a messed up A-HA fricken moment to wake up to! Thank you sunegrl- lol

I've been doing some self help techniques to help me feel better about my self. Have you ever used the stream of consciousness journal writing technique? My best friend turned me on to a few self-help books, one in which is called: The Artist's Way.

The book is a twelve week program, with three steps that once completed in the 12 weeks will change your life.... I'm on week one right now and I can tell you "The Morning Pages" technique is really getting me to see just how terribly mean I am to myself and spirit. 
Every morning you are forced to take the first hour of your waking time and write from your stream of consciousness, in a journal, by hand. It is not a writing assignment, but rather a truth telling assignment of what you are subconsciously and mentally telling YOURSELF. No need for proper grammar, good spelling, or penmanship.... What is encouraged is honesty, the mumbo-jumbo- mixed up-incoherent words, thoughts, and feelings that go through your head on a regular basis. You just write…write…write… every little thing that whispers in your ears, and screams at you in the silence of the morning.
I have noticed since taking on this lesson, that I am really down on myself. I treat myself like a piece of garbage, I am a broken record brainwashing myself to believe I am ugly, insignificant, useless, a wreak, fat, dumb, old, worthless and hopeless. 
 Now on to the positive part of these morning exercises- you go back and rewrite every negative thing you tell yourself, and turn it around into positive statements, thus- you are rewiring your stream of consciousness, and allowing your spirit to guide you, instead of letting all the horrible, agonizing, and uncontrollable personal events from your past guide you.
If you are interested in pursuing the artist within you… and when I say artist- I mean the artist of your life script from the present moment… please comment here, and let me know if you have a copy of this book, and how the lessons are going for you. It would be great to meet others on this personal journey.

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